Sunday, October 16, 2011

It Happens

Today i am feeling SAD, Upset, angry and .......I dont know...
My kido and hubby is asking what happen to you.....Did we did something to make u angry?
No! Then Why am I Upset? I dont know!!!
Am I angry on someone?
Am I annoyed of someone?
Am I Upset of something?
I want answere........
I am feeling horrible, restless, as if, I did something wrong!
As if, I betrayed someone!
As if I left someone behind! Whom I should be with!!!
Actually Breathless.......
Why? I don't know
It is late night, rainy outside and dark in my heart....
The best place I felt at this time is near window........
Generally, I don't open that window, a nice sitting place is there.....
Cold wind touched my skin and I felt as if it touched me within, slowly-slowly it reached my heart, embraced it, which was feeling dark.
And all of sudden it lighten up.
I closed my eyes and felt as if, I am flying in wind and met the lost friend...
Yes, I realised, the one I betrayed is "me".
The one who always helped me to perform my duties as mother, wife, friend, professional and many more characters, I forgot her.....
In performing my duties I just keep on expecting form her and gave her nothing in return.
Today, when she got tired and sick...I cant do a single thing...
I am nothing without her......and I forgot her?
But now onwards.....I will do my best to keep her happy, cheer her up, do things she like...and always hold her hand where ever I go....I will stop if she is tired....
Today I commit to Myself as well.